Wednesday, March 24, 2010

self worth

   I happened to look at my horoscope today, and instead of some crass, inane forcast about my day, there was this single profound statment.  This is what is important to me and it came from the Star Tribune Horoscope:

       "Your value is not dependent on how many people are "friending" you on a social networking site -- or in real  life.  You determine your value, and popularity has nothing to do with it."

     How much this statement means to me,  I have my own self worth, I am making life-time changes for myself.  Not because someone wants to cyberbully me, or attempt to intimidate me or even tell lies about me.    I hope people who read this are able to make the same applicable changes for their own lives.

    About my journey into these changes, they are on multiple levels and at different stages all of them.  I am trying to be more aware of my eating habits, and try to make clear and healthy choices for everything.  Of course, sometimes I am going to slip, but, I am right back on track slugging away at these unwanted pounds as determinedly as I can be.  I joined the 12 week wellness program put on by the hospital,  every week we weigh in so I have to be accountable, not only to me, but to the personal trainer and the dietitians who have personally designed a program suited just for me.  I want to be a success story for them as well as myself.

   I have been religious about working out 5 times a week.  I can really tell in my arm strength, and my core strength increasing has improved my balance significantly.  I don't fall nearly as often, which is good, but not nearly as entertaining to my horses as when I wasn't as stable in my core.  I fell a lot then.  And of course, after I fall there is always some significant profanity following said event.  I  admit, I don't always get to the club to workout, but if I don't get there, I make a plan to do something at home, either with my workout DVD's or I take a walk down the state trail in front of our house.   Last night was one of those nights, I knew I wasn't going to the club, so I took a mile and a half walk down the trail,  accompanied by 5 dogs, and 1 cat, ( I don't think Tommy knew what he was getting himself into, but once we got as far away as we were, he no choice but to follow us home!)  Poor Tommy will probably not want to walk with us ever again!  He was so funny!  I love putting on my iPod and just walking to the beat, some of my favorite songs to walk to are by Queen, so I have learned many of their songs by heart.  Another song I can really get a power walk going to is by The WeatherGirls, it is called; "Its Raining Men", love that song!!  It has such a peppy beat, and it is just fun to listen to the words to for me.  I enjoy my walks outside tremendously, and am grateful for the trail to walk on so my pets and I are semi protected from the dangers of road traffic.

     I have renewed friendships with some of my high school friends, the tried and true friends that even though I hadn't seen or spoken with them for many, many years, it felt as though we had just talked yesterday.  They will be my friends for an eternity, this I know.  These are the people who know me for who I really am, not  some fly by night friendship that only ends in hurt and betrayal.  These are the people I can share something in confidence and not have it proclaimed in a half truth to everyone who would listen.  That happened to me, I guess it wasn't a reflection so much on me as it was on the character of the person who did that to me. Needless to say, this friendhsip didn't survive... It involved some of those changes for life...

1 comment:

  1. How wonderful to have a renewed sense of self! I am working on it, but I have not come to the place you are at yet.


With some very sage advice, from a knowledgeable long time blogger, moderation has begun. So you bat-shit crazy people will be invited to stay off my blog!