Little Robbie adopted us 4 weeks, ago. A small straggly, sickly young cat. He was scared to death of the dogs, but, loved people. Robbie used to rub and rub and rub his body against us when he walked near one of us. Beautiful Siamese coloring with the gorgeous blue eyes, Robbie imeediately made himself at home within our house, with absolutely no intention of ever going outside again. Robbie did not like being inside a kennel and although his protests were mostly quiet, the skin taken off his nose by constantly pressing it against the bars told the story of his unhappiness. We had decided that Robbie would be a permanent member of our household, and set forth to get him checked out by a vet and do all the necessary vaccinations needed to make him a healthy, much loved cat. First on the list during his exam was a feline leukemia test, as that was being done, the examination showed many of Robbie's teeth were missing, not a good sign. We also brought our other kitten Tommy for his exam and vaccinations. Tommy's leukemia test was negative, but, sadly Robbie tested positive for feline leukemia, and we made the very tearful decision to put Robbie to sleep. We can only rest assured that the last 4 weeks of his life, he knew he was much loved with a warm place to sleep whenever he wanted to.
RIP Robbie, we will miss you. See you in heaven!
Sunday, November 29, 2009
Wednesday, November 25, 2009
Thankfulness
I thought today would be a great day for me to think of the millions of things I have in this world to be thankful for:
Starting off this list is my thankfulness that I am back to work and that I have a good job to go back to. I truly love my job, and am so thankful for the many jobs I have had that led me to this career choice. I have been a surgical technologist for more than 20 years now, and it just seems like yesterday that I was working in a bar, saying to myself, " I sure don't want to be doing this for the rest of my life". I won't be, perhaps, I might work as a bartender when I retire, just for a " fun job".
I am so thankful that I wasn't injured any worse than I was this summer, and I am thankful that a knowledgeable health-care person was riding with me. Thanks Jen!! I am also thankful to Jennifer and her husband Russ for taking me to the emergency room, and home again, then taking me to my CT Scan the next day, and for getting me a shower that night BEFORE driving me into North Memorial hospital the following day for my surgery. THEN, taking me home! Now, that is a friendship!!! These are the type of friends I like to have in my life. I have many friends, who are there at the drop of a hat, to lend a hand, offer support, both emotional and physical.
I am grateful for my friends, they were there when I had to call on them. Anywhere from taking some of my horses off my hands while I was recovering, to helping me with my fences and making my yard and home presentable.
I have this terrific farrier, that I absolutely adore, he is the greatest guy, never has an unkind word about anyone, and he really did me some kindness this summer!! He has not had an easy life, but, he is there when the chips are down.
I am truly thankful for HOT running water... I think about this as I am outside doing chores in the cold rain, I can always go inside and step into the hot shower!!! It keeps me warm as I am freezing my fingers off!
My wonderful son has another top spot on my gratefulness list. He is so kind, considerate, sensitive, helpful and giving. I can only hope to emulate him someday. He was my rock this summer, when I needed someone to help me go to the bathroom, get into bed, get dressed and even to get out of bed. He brought me food and fed me when I didn't have any ability to feed myself ( not that I needed food, I could survive at least a month on my reserves...), he got my medicines in order ( with help from Jen) and made sure I didn't take them too often ( he is very good at watching the clock), so I didn't end up like Anna Nicole... Poor kid had to learn how to hook and unhook a bra...( I wasn't sure I really wanted him to find out how to do that at age 11...)
I am thankful for my family who has come through for me many times over the years. I pray that we can all stay close-knit through the many years to come.
I am thankful for my mentors with my beekeeping endeavors, they helped me when I needed it from answering inane questions, to checking my bees when I couldn't lift the boxes. I learned so much under their tutelage, and look forward to many more years of learning and friendship!
I am grateful for my trainer, for taking Sahib at a moments notice, and giving him another 30 days to try and find if he had a problem ( other than his person not paying attention to the signals he was trying to give them), and for her encouragement when it came time for me to climb aboard a horse again, it is funny, after 40 plus years of riding, I lost my nerve when I got hurt this time...
I am so thankful for a healthy herd of mostly geriatric horses, I am grateful I have had Coni in my life for the past 29 years, and Shom for the past 21, these horses have taught me so much and been there for me through thick and thin ( mostly thick I think...). I look forward to havnig horses in my life hopefully, for the rest of my life.
I am thankful I have a banker who gives me a hay loan each fall, so I don't have to struggle to find a way to pay my hay guy. I have worked hard to develop a relationship with my hay people, and like to be able to count on a quality product, because they know I am a good costumer.
I am grateful for the ability to read, so that I could enjoy the Twilight series, over and over and over...Go Team Edward!!!!!
I am thankful I had Gary, my Pekin duck in my life, no matter how brief that time seemed to me, he was such a character, I loved him dearly and know he is over the Rainbow Bridge with all the other much loved pets in our lives.
I am thankful that God smiled on me when this property came available to purchase back in 1997, without that purchase I would not be where I am today, a homeowner with a terrific child, 3 entertaining cats, 5 happy-go-lucky dogs, 10 contented horses, 4 independent ducks and 12 endearing chickens!
Thank you also, to those of you who read my ramblings, sometimes, I write to entertain, sometimes to enlighten, sometimes to vent, but always to be read ( even if only by me!!!)
Starting off this list is my thankfulness that I am back to work and that I have a good job to go back to. I truly love my job, and am so thankful for the many jobs I have had that led me to this career choice. I have been a surgical technologist for more than 20 years now, and it just seems like yesterday that I was working in a bar, saying to myself, " I sure don't want to be doing this for the rest of my life". I won't be, perhaps, I might work as a bartender when I retire, just for a " fun job".
I am so thankful that I wasn't injured any worse than I was this summer, and I am thankful that a knowledgeable health-care person was riding with me. Thanks Jen!! I am also thankful to Jennifer and her husband Russ for taking me to the emergency room, and home again, then taking me to my CT Scan the next day, and for getting me a shower that night BEFORE driving me into North Memorial hospital the following day for my surgery. THEN, taking me home! Now, that is a friendship!!! These are the type of friends I like to have in my life. I have many friends, who are there at the drop of a hat, to lend a hand, offer support, both emotional and physical.
I am grateful for my friends, they were there when I had to call on them. Anywhere from taking some of my horses off my hands while I was recovering, to helping me with my fences and making my yard and home presentable.
I have this terrific farrier, that I absolutely adore, he is the greatest guy, never has an unkind word about anyone, and he really did me some kindness this summer!! He has not had an easy life, but, he is there when the chips are down.
I am truly thankful for HOT running water... I think about this as I am outside doing chores in the cold rain, I can always go inside and step into the hot shower!!! It keeps me warm as I am freezing my fingers off!
My wonderful son has another top spot on my gratefulness list. He is so kind, considerate, sensitive, helpful and giving. I can only hope to emulate him someday. He was my rock this summer, when I needed someone to help me go to the bathroom, get into bed, get dressed and even to get out of bed. He brought me food and fed me when I didn't have any ability to feed myself ( not that I needed food, I could survive at least a month on my reserves...), he got my medicines in order ( with help from Jen) and made sure I didn't take them too often ( he is very good at watching the clock), so I didn't end up like Anna Nicole... Poor kid had to learn how to hook and unhook a bra...( I wasn't sure I really wanted him to find out how to do that at age 11...)
I am thankful for my family who has come through for me many times over the years. I pray that we can all stay close-knit through the many years to come.
I am thankful for my mentors with my beekeeping endeavors, they helped me when I needed it from answering inane questions, to checking my bees when I couldn't lift the boxes. I learned so much under their tutelage, and look forward to many more years of learning and friendship!
I am grateful for my trainer, for taking Sahib at a moments notice, and giving him another 30 days to try and find if he had a problem ( other than his person not paying attention to the signals he was trying to give them), and for her encouragement when it came time for me to climb aboard a horse again, it is funny, after 40 plus years of riding, I lost my nerve when I got hurt this time...
I am so thankful for a healthy herd of mostly geriatric horses, I am grateful I have had Coni in my life for the past 29 years, and Shom for the past 21, these horses have taught me so much and been there for me through thick and thin ( mostly thick I think...). I look forward to havnig horses in my life hopefully, for the rest of my life.
I am thankful I have a banker who gives me a hay loan each fall, so I don't have to struggle to find a way to pay my hay guy. I have worked hard to develop a relationship with my hay people, and like to be able to count on a quality product, because they know I am a good costumer.
I am grateful for the ability to read, so that I could enjoy the Twilight series, over and over and over...Go Team Edward!!!!!
I am thankful I had Gary, my Pekin duck in my life, no matter how brief that time seemed to me, he was such a character, I loved him dearly and know he is over the Rainbow Bridge with all the other much loved pets in our lives.
I am thankful that God smiled on me when this property came available to purchase back in 1997, without that purchase I would not be where I am today, a homeowner with a terrific child, 3 entertaining cats, 5 happy-go-lucky dogs, 10 contented horses, 4 independent ducks and 12 endearing chickens!
Thank you also, to those of you who read my ramblings, sometimes, I write to entertain, sometimes to enlighten, sometimes to vent, but always to be read ( even if only by me!!!)
Saturday, October 31, 2009
True scary Halloween story
I have been meaning to put this to a web page for quite some time, but, it is so scary to me, that I have a difficult time thinking about it, hence it hasn't appeared in the written format.
This is a true story and scary enough that no embellishments are needed.
The Lonely Road
Many years ago, I used to take a short cut to the job I worked at in town. This short cut involved several miles of gravel roads with no houses for miles. I traveled this road many times without incident, even to the point of getting a flat tire on the most deserted portion of this road, and having to walk the 3 miles back home.
Strangely, one fall, I started to discover this eerie feeling whenever I found the need to take this " short cut" at night. Like something was there, watching me, waiting for me to have to stop and pull over in the darkest, most deserted portion of that road.
The road is just like any other gravel road, but, at one point it meanders through this swampy area, and it is there the road is also at its lowest point, so it is often covered by wisps of fog.
The swampy area is where I found myself feeling the worst, I just felt something evil lurked there, I don't know what it was, never saw or heard anything to make me feel this way, I just felt I was in danger there at night. I continued to travel this path, partly, because of my stubborness, I refused to let fear get the best of me, I have always felt that facing my fear allows me to rise above my it. And the other reason, I continued to drive this road, was because it WAS a short cut to my place of employment, and since I am usually running late, it seemed like an acceptable alternative to being late for work.
This feeling persisted, all fall that year (1988), and it got so bad that as soon as I was on the road, the hair on the back of my neck would start to rise. I was terrified driving that road!!! Finally, I gave in, I stopped driving the "short cut" for any reason at night.
The daylight hours were safe, and I continued to travel this road only in the daylight.
For an entire year I avoided that road at night at all costs.
A year or so later, we were traveling as a family and decided to tell ghost stories, and as we were entertaining each other, I decided to tell my story about the road, knowing my brothers and sisters all traveled the same road.
As I was telling my story, I could see my younger sister, getting more and more pale and silent, I thought I might be unnecessarily scaring her ( used to scare her all the time by riding my horse up to her bedroom window, and with my horse's head peeking in I would whisper her name, I am kinda twisted that way...), and sought to reassure her that the feeling I had was gone, what ever had been down there in that swampy area was gone. She just looked at me with terrified eyes, and said, " The EXACT same thing was happening to me, I stopped driving that road because I was so scared". Both of us looked at each other and my family got silent, this was the most frightening part for me, because I thought I had been enduring this fear alone, and to discover that my little sister had been experiencing the same phenomenon, made it all the more frightening and real!!!
To this day, I travel that road with trepidation, especially at night, I know what ever was out there causing me such fear is gone, but, who's to say it won't come back?
This is a true story and scary enough that no embellishments are needed.
The Lonely Road
Many years ago, I used to take a short cut to the job I worked at in town. This short cut involved several miles of gravel roads with no houses for miles. I traveled this road many times without incident, even to the point of getting a flat tire on the most deserted portion of this road, and having to walk the 3 miles back home.
Strangely, one fall, I started to discover this eerie feeling whenever I found the need to take this " short cut" at night. Like something was there, watching me, waiting for me to have to stop and pull over in the darkest, most deserted portion of that road.
The road is just like any other gravel road, but, at one point it meanders through this swampy area, and it is there the road is also at its lowest point, so it is often covered by wisps of fog.
The swampy area is where I found myself feeling the worst, I just felt something evil lurked there, I don't know what it was, never saw or heard anything to make me feel this way, I just felt I was in danger there at night. I continued to travel this path, partly, because of my stubborness, I refused to let fear get the best of me, I have always felt that facing my fear allows me to rise above my it. And the other reason, I continued to drive this road, was because it WAS a short cut to my place of employment, and since I am usually running late, it seemed like an acceptable alternative to being late for work.
This feeling persisted, all fall that year (1988), and it got so bad that as soon as I was on the road, the hair on the back of my neck would start to rise. I was terrified driving that road!!! Finally, I gave in, I stopped driving the "short cut" for any reason at night.
The daylight hours were safe, and I continued to travel this road only in the daylight.
For an entire year I avoided that road at night at all costs.
A year or so later, we were traveling as a family and decided to tell ghost stories, and as we were entertaining each other, I decided to tell my story about the road, knowing my brothers and sisters all traveled the same road.
As I was telling my story, I could see my younger sister, getting more and more pale and silent, I thought I might be unnecessarily scaring her ( used to scare her all the time by riding my horse up to her bedroom window, and with my horse's head peeking in I would whisper her name, I am kinda twisted that way...), and sought to reassure her that the feeling I had was gone, what ever had been down there in that swampy area was gone. She just looked at me with terrified eyes, and said, " The EXACT same thing was happening to me, I stopped driving that road because I was so scared". Both of us looked at each other and my family got silent, this was the most frightening part for me, because I thought I had been enduring this fear alone, and to discover that my little sister had been experiencing the same phenomenon, made it all the more frightening and real!!!
To this day, I travel that road with trepidation, especially at night, I know what ever was out there causing me such fear is gone, but, who's to say it won't come back?
Monday, September 21, 2009
The total and utter disregard
.jpg){kind=spacer}
.jpg){kind=spacer}
.jpg){kind=spacer}
.jpg){kind=spacer}
I am absolutely sickened by what I had to retrieve today. I went to retrieve my winter horse blankets that I had borrowed to someone. I had the foresight to ask the sherriff's dept to accompany me. When we arrived I was told my blankets were already to go, but, it took at least 20 very uncomfortable minutes with this person making unnecessary comments the entire time. I find I am short 4 blankets, no surpise here I guess. But, the total destroyed state of one of my Weatherbeetas, well, it just makes me sick to my stomach. How, can ANYONE justify this?
There is simply NO excuse for caring for someone else's things like this!!!!! So, if you want to know who I borrowed these blankets to, just ask, I will be glad to tell. See you in court!!!
Thursday, September 17, 2009
Time to clear the air
I don't really know or care if anyone reads this, but, it is time for me to get this off my chest.
The whole sordid story began last October ( I think) when blog I rarely frequent posted about a "horse rescue" close to my home. Since I felt I had a good idea about what goes on here in my own small corner of the horsey world ( perhaps an arrogant thought, but, it was my own), I was surprised to hear about this via an Internet blog. So I posted that I knew nothing about a horse rescue in the area and was surprised to find one online actually asking total strangers for money to pay electricity bills and phone bills. That in itself to me seemed strange. But, the drama continued, and became increasingly strange. I was accused of being a total flake, and that strangers to me on the Internet knew ALL about me. That weirded me out and also infuriated me, I have always tried to be the best person I can be, and play it straight with people, perhaps in some person's eyes that equated me with being a total flake, I don't know. I am known for telling it like it is, and being honest in my business dealings with people. I digress, this person posted their phone number and so I called them to ask if it would be acceptable to come and view their facility to put to rest all the ugly rumors. I was told the "board" decided not to allow this, I was ok with that, no worries. I also shared with this person ( during a very long, long phone conversation) resources right here in the county that might be able to help them out. I also, in the course of several conversations ( by phone) invited this person to the horse group meeting I hold each winter ( an opportunity to network fellow horse lovers, as well as educate with new/old innovations), AND offered borrow them my older horse blankets. I had found out that they had several young and old stock that would benefit by the loan of my blankets, I felt good about doing this.
In January, I got was speaking to this person ( on the phone again), and they sounded really stressed out. Found out they were almost out of hay ( feeding almost 20 horses takes a lot of hay) and they couldn't purchase more hay until their bill with that hay guy got paid up. I happened at that exact moment to have $600 in my hand, so, I offered to loan it to this person so they could get more hay. I was promised to be repaid when they got their taxes back ( I guess they neglected to mention which year...). Although, I don't have money to spare, I lent it to them knowing I was helping the horses, and thought it was a good thing. You have to understand as a single parent, (with no child support to speak of), there are times in my life when I don't know how I am going to get the gas to drive back and forth to work. The Lord always provides though, I have to trust this ( hard concept).
I was berated by many people for doing this, many of them knowing this person and their history, I chose to ignore this sage advice, and continued thinking I was doing the right thing by the horses. At the same time, I often wondered, how this person could continually be on the Internet how they were paying those bills if their horses didn't have hay to eat... I knew those horses needed food, and so I offered to donate what ground feed I had for them to feed their sr horses with. I had a garbage can filled with Equine SR. ( 3 bags worth), and a garbage can filled with sweet feed ( also, 3 bags worth), plus some beet pulp, they came over and took it all, once again, I knew I was doing something good for the horses.
I waited until March, for some payment on the $600 loan, nothing seemed forthcoming. Disaster struck, my run in shed tipped over in a strong wind and I knew I would have to hire someone to right it again. I called this person and begged them for some repayment of that $600 loan. By the end of the week, the SO was bringing over $300. I was glad I had some of my loan back.
Months went by with no more indication of repayment, so, in June I proposed a deal, if they would help me fix my fence, they could work off the $300 still owed on the loan. Now, my idea of them helping me fix my fence was to show them what needed fixing and provide the supplies. Apparently, this person was waiting for me to help them with the actual work or something. So, nothing ever happened regarding stringing new wire on my fence. But, they needed hay hauled, and asked if I could haul their trailer for them and they would pay me for gas. I hauled hay twice, once with my little 2 horse trailer, and once with their huge stock trailer. Neither time, was gas money offered.
I was injured in a riding accident in July, haven't worked since, ( hoping to go back this month), but, I had purchased hay in the beginning of July, to feed my " time out" paddock boys. After my injury, a friend on mine offered to take some of my horses off my hands so I wouldn't have to continue to line up people to come and feed hay to those horses stuck on the dry lot. So, I had some hay that I was no longer feeding, well, who would call and ask if they could purchase hay from me? I told them they could purchase they hay for what I paid for it. They would be there the following evening and bring supper. So, suppertime rolls around and no sign of this person, we waited until after 8:00 and still no word from them, so I prepared my 11 yr old son something to eat. Then, about 8:45 a phone call, a belt on their car had broken, but, they were on their way. I tried to let them know a meal was unnecessary, but, this person stated they hadn't eaten either, and they were going to bring a meal over. I was tired and just wanted to go to bed ( recovering from a major injury is exhausting, especially when there is painful OT/PT involved).
It was past 10:00 when they finally appeared, I know they would not have come over had they not been desperate for hay. Got some hay loaded into their car and then waited for the meal to be done, so, it is going on 11:00 I am really tired and just ache for my bed, don't wish to cleanup the meal, can't wait for company to leave so I can crash. I am promised a check for the hay they are purchasing, but, they neglect to leave one that night. when I am at PT/OT the next day, they come for the rest of the hay they have agreed to purchase ( 10 bales total), again, neglect to leave a check. By this time, I am aware of how this person conveniently "forgets" to pay for items, esp when it is friends. I have noticed how it is ALWAYS someone else's fault no matter what goes on in their life. I have seen how they are treated by total strangers in their own neighborhood ( rather scary actually), and am putting 2 plus 2 together. So, I track this person down to the sales barn the next night determined to at least get a check for the hay purchased from me. At this point I haven't worked in almost a month, and any money is welcomed and needed, which is why I agreed to sell them 10 bales of hay. Got a check, and watched as they purchased several stacks of hay with no way of hauling it other than relying on the goodness of other people to haul it for them. I had earlier stated I could not haul hay for them as it was too far out of my way, and my vehicle was not in condition to haul heavy loads.
I promised not to cash said check until they told me it was ok to do so, ( I was told " it is easier for me to bring you the cash than for you to deposit this check"). So, I waited to cash it, in the meantime, I sent out an email plea for my friends to come out and help me with a job that this person had already agreed to do in repayment of the $300 debt still owed. This person replied immediately, that they would be there The morning the fencing was planned. That morning rolled around, and this person didn't show, not so much as a phone call. Then, the next day, hours after everyone had finished, her SO and child came over, there was no more work to do. Last week, I brought the check this person wrote, to the bank to verify funds, hmmm "ACCT CLOSED". My guess is this person knew the account was closed prior to writing any check to me, which is why they would have rather brought me cash than have me deposit that check.
I have had it with the excuses, and the lies, and the cryptic remarks on their blog regarding stuff that goes on in their lives. I can only warn anyone who befriends this person, beware. "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me." " no good deed goes unpunished". So, I guess I consider myself fortunate, this person has only gotten away with $324.00 of my money, it could have been so much worse.
So, now, I am a little poorer, a lot wiser, and less trusting and willing to help out the next guy who might be in need. I don't forget easily, and forgiveness is not something that I hold in me right now. Perhaps someday, but, not now, Karma, that is all I can say, someday, karma will come and bite you right where it needs to. I know jail doesn't faze you, and neither does losing something dear to you, so what does it take for a person like this to feel remorse?? To understand you don't take advantage of friends, ( which is probably why they don't really have any good friends nearby). You lost one of those right here, so no more cryptic remarks , let the truth be known, admit you owe me money deal with it. Go out and get a real job, work at attending said job so you don't get terminated, bring home a paycheck so YOU can pay for your own horses, stop acquiring horses, live with in your means and be honest, that is what is required of you in this world, then you won't have to make up "Internet stalkers" and "people coming to your house" and "people driving past your house slowly" jeez, I bet folks around here have much better things to do than what you are cryptically insinuating they are doing. Get a life!
The whole sordid story began last October ( I think) when blog I rarely frequent posted about a "horse rescue" close to my home. Since I felt I had a good idea about what goes on here in my own small corner of the horsey world ( perhaps an arrogant thought, but, it was my own), I was surprised to hear about this via an Internet blog. So I posted that I knew nothing about a horse rescue in the area and was surprised to find one online actually asking total strangers for money to pay electricity bills and phone bills. That in itself to me seemed strange. But, the drama continued, and became increasingly strange. I was accused of being a total flake, and that strangers to me on the Internet knew ALL about me. That weirded me out and also infuriated me, I have always tried to be the best person I can be, and play it straight with people, perhaps in some person's eyes that equated me with being a total flake, I don't know. I am known for telling it like it is, and being honest in my business dealings with people. I digress, this person posted their phone number and so I called them to ask if it would be acceptable to come and view their facility to put to rest all the ugly rumors. I was told the "board" decided not to allow this, I was ok with that, no worries. I also shared with this person ( during a very long, long phone conversation) resources right here in the county that might be able to help them out. I also, in the course of several conversations ( by phone) invited this person to the horse group meeting I hold each winter ( an opportunity to network fellow horse lovers, as well as educate with new/old innovations), AND offered borrow them my older horse blankets. I had found out that they had several young and old stock that would benefit by the loan of my blankets, I felt good about doing this.
In January, I got was speaking to this person ( on the phone again), and they sounded really stressed out. Found out they were almost out of hay ( feeding almost 20 horses takes a lot of hay) and they couldn't purchase more hay until their bill with that hay guy got paid up. I happened at that exact moment to have $600 in my hand, so, I offered to loan it to this person so they could get more hay. I was promised to be repaid when they got their taxes back ( I guess they neglected to mention which year...). Although, I don't have money to spare, I lent it to them knowing I was helping the horses, and thought it was a good thing. You have to understand as a single parent, (with no child support to speak of), there are times in my life when I don't know how I am going to get the gas to drive back and forth to work. The Lord always provides though, I have to trust this ( hard concept).
I was berated by many people for doing this, many of them knowing this person and their history, I chose to ignore this sage advice, and continued thinking I was doing the right thing by the horses. At the same time, I often wondered, how this person could continually be on the Internet how they were paying those bills if their horses didn't have hay to eat... I knew those horses needed food, and so I offered to donate what ground feed I had for them to feed their sr horses with. I had a garbage can filled with Equine SR. ( 3 bags worth), and a garbage can filled with sweet feed ( also, 3 bags worth), plus some beet pulp, they came over and took it all, once again, I knew I was doing something good for the horses.
I waited until March, for some payment on the $600 loan, nothing seemed forthcoming. Disaster struck, my run in shed tipped over in a strong wind and I knew I would have to hire someone to right it again. I called this person and begged them for some repayment of that $600 loan. By the end of the week, the SO was bringing over $300. I was glad I had some of my loan back.
Months went by with no more indication of repayment, so, in June I proposed a deal, if they would help me fix my fence, they could work off the $300 still owed on the loan. Now, my idea of them helping me fix my fence was to show them what needed fixing and provide the supplies. Apparently, this person was waiting for me to help them with the actual work or something. So, nothing ever happened regarding stringing new wire on my fence. But, they needed hay hauled, and asked if I could haul their trailer for them and they would pay me for gas. I hauled hay twice, once with my little 2 horse trailer, and once with their huge stock trailer. Neither time, was gas money offered.
I was injured in a riding accident in July, haven't worked since, ( hoping to go back this month), but, I had purchased hay in the beginning of July, to feed my " time out" paddock boys. After my injury, a friend on mine offered to take some of my horses off my hands so I wouldn't have to continue to line up people to come and feed hay to those horses stuck on the dry lot. So, I had some hay that I was no longer feeding, well, who would call and ask if they could purchase hay from me? I told them they could purchase they hay for what I paid for it. They would be there the following evening and bring supper. So, suppertime rolls around and no sign of this person, we waited until after 8:00 and still no word from them, so I prepared my 11 yr old son something to eat. Then, about 8:45 a phone call, a belt on their car had broken, but, they were on their way. I tried to let them know a meal was unnecessary, but, this person stated they hadn't eaten either, and they were going to bring a meal over. I was tired and just wanted to go to bed ( recovering from a major injury is exhausting, especially when there is painful OT/PT involved).
It was past 10:00 when they finally appeared, I know they would not have come over had they not been desperate for hay. Got some hay loaded into their car and then waited for the meal to be done, so, it is going on 11:00 I am really tired and just ache for my bed, don't wish to cleanup the meal, can't wait for company to leave so I can crash. I am promised a check for the hay they are purchasing, but, they neglect to leave one that night. when I am at PT/OT the next day, they come for the rest of the hay they have agreed to purchase ( 10 bales total), again, neglect to leave a check. By this time, I am aware of how this person conveniently "forgets" to pay for items, esp when it is friends. I have noticed how it is ALWAYS someone else's fault no matter what goes on in their life. I have seen how they are treated by total strangers in their own neighborhood ( rather scary actually), and am putting 2 plus 2 together. So, I track this person down to the sales barn the next night determined to at least get a check for the hay purchased from me. At this point I haven't worked in almost a month, and any money is welcomed and needed, which is why I agreed to sell them 10 bales of hay. Got a check, and watched as they purchased several stacks of hay with no way of hauling it other than relying on the goodness of other people to haul it for them. I had earlier stated I could not haul hay for them as it was too far out of my way, and my vehicle was not in condition to haul heavy loads.
I promised not to cash said check until they told me it was ok to do so, ( I was told " it is easier for me to bring you the cash than for you to deposit this check"). So, I waited to cash it, in the meantime, I sent out an email plea for my friends to come out and help me with a job that this person had already agreed to do in repayment of the $300 debt still owed. This person replied immediately, that they would be there The morning the fencing was planned. That morning rolled around, and this person didn't show, not so much as a phone call. Then, the next day, hours after everyone had finished, her SO and child came over, there was no more work to do. Last week, I brought the check this person wrote, to the bank to verify funds, hmmm "ACCT CLOSED". My guess is this person knew the account was closed prior to writing any check to me, which is why they would have rather brought me cash than have me deposit that check.
I have had it with the excuses, and the lies, and the cryptic remarks on their blog regarding stuff that goes on in their lives. I can only warn anyone who befriends this person, beware. "Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me twice, shame on me." " no good deed goes unpunished". So, I guess I consider myself fortunate, this person has only gotten away with $324.00 of my money, it could have been so much worse.
So, now, I am a little poorer, a lot wiser, and less trusting and willing to help out the next guy who might be in need. I don't forget easily, and forgiveness is not something that I hold in me right now. Perhaps someday, but, not now, Karma, that is all I can say, someday, karma will come and bite you right where it needs to. I know jail doesn't faze you, and neither does losing something dear to you, so what does it take for a person like this to feel remorse?? To understand you don't take advantage of friends, ( which is probably why they don't really have any good friends nearby). You lost one of those right here, so no more cryptic remarks , let the truth be known, admit you owe me money deal with it. Go out and get a real job, work at attending said job so you don't get terminated, bring home a paycheck so YOU can pay for your own horses, stop acquiring horses, live with in your means and be honest, that is what is required of you in this world, then you won't have to make up "Internet stalkers" and "people coming to your house" and "people driving past your house slowly" jeez, I bet folks around here have much better things to do than what you are cryptically insinuating they are doing. Get a life!
Friday, August 14, 2009
exasperation
Had my dr appt yesterday, told him how badly I needed to get back to work ( these disability checks just aren't enough to cover my monthly expenses). So, I talked him into letting me return @ the end of Aug. But, the restrictions he put on my return are so unrealistic I can't believe it! My job description requires I be able to lift up to 50 lbs, my limit to return to work? 5 lbs!! Now, who in their right mind ever thinks of how much 5 lbs actually is? The weight is so light it is almost inconsequential! A gallon of milk is 7 lbs, for crying out loud, my truck door is heavier than that when I open or shut it! ( That has actually been kind of difficult to open and close...) So, needless to say, my supervisor isn't really happy about my workability sheet, I can't twist or torque with my right arm, and no lifting above chest level with my left arm... So, where can I work? No where is my thinking, I can't clean instruments cuz the trays are over 5 lbs. I can't clean shelves because many of them are above my head, ( and the inventory on them is over 5 lbs.) I might be able to put together charts ( joy...)but, that won't take 8 hours every day either.
Don't get me wrong, I am not displeased with my recovery, and neither is the dr. he just thinks that I am trying to get back into the whole swing of things too quickly ( but, he doesn't live on my wages either). He is really concerned about me dislocating the elbow, and then I would be starting over again with the whole shebang.
As far as my left shoulder, I guess I should be pleased with the progress I have made there, I have completely normal range of motion, some strength, and much less pain than when I first injured it. MRI is going to show what the real problem is I guess, but, I have to wait for the ins, company to approve that test.
Speaking of bills, man, I can't believe the cost of hospitalization! And to think I complained about a $1000 emergency room bill ( for pneumonia 4 yrs ago)! The amount is staggering, for this injury! I am very glad to have insurance!
The upside of all this time off, is I get to spend the summer with my son! We have been to the beach every day so far this week, and he has enjoyed it immensely!
The other good thing is I have had time to help my mentors with my bee hives, ( and theirs), since I can't lift my 70 lb boxes ( I have plenty of honey, let me tell you!!) I have been trying to help out in other ways, like watching their children so they can get stuff done, and have some alone time. Hopefully, it is enough.
I am overwhelmed by the outpouring of support from my church and friends, there is a gentleman from church coming over today to mow my lawn, ( he fixed my mower , again, since somehow the air cleaner and cover fell off and got mowed over...) with my mower so he can check it out to make sure it runs alright, and I get my lawn mowed! It is so difficult to rely on others to do things you are so accustomed to doing yourself! And it is sooooo hard for me to ask for help!! Why is that? Number 1, the guilt; I feel I should be able to do these things, but, I can't even wring out a mop! how sad is that!? Number 2,: the loss of my independence, I have prided myself on my ability to be completely independent, able to figure things out myself without the help of a male around. I have replaced the belt on my dryer drum, I can change my own oil on my car, I can change a flat tire, I can take off the pipes under the sinks in my house to clean out the trap ( remember, gravity and I argue often, gravity wins!) Heck, I can even change an element on my water heater if I had to ( have the tool, don't ask why...)
Now, I can't even change the belt on my vacuum cleaner, ( need the use of 2 strong hands for that), and I am too proud to ask someone to do it for me... how stupid is that? People I know, want to help, but, how do I just let go and let them? Better I think, for folks to just take over and say, this is what is going to happen and you can't change it, so just sit down and relax, ( not that I would relax when someone is doing my work for me, )
Crap, enough feeling sorry for myself, Tomorrow is Garlic fest in Hutchinson, and we have been preparing all week for it! We are going to have a booth there and will be demonstrating extracting honey from the hive the entire day!!! It is going to be a great day! My box of honey is plum full! My mentor thought I should enter a frame in the State Fair, but, I am too anxious to extract it and get honey! Besides, I am definitely not up for a State Fair visit this year, ( as well as it being cost prohibitive).
Happily, I will have enough honey for Christmas gifts ( my goal this year). And perhaps even some for purchase ( haven't decided on that yet).
Enough with the whining...
Don't get me wrong, I am not displeased with my recovery, and neither is the dr. he just thinks that I am trying to get back into the whole swing of things too quickly ( but, he doesn't live on my wages either). He is really concerned about me dislocating the elbow, and then I would be starting over again with the whole shebang.
As far as my left shoulder, I guess I should be pleased with the progress I have made there, I have completely normal range of motion, some strength, and much less pain than when I first injured it. MRI is going to show what the real problem is I guess, but, I have to wait for the ins, company to approve that test.
Speaking of bills, man, I can't believe the cost of hospitalization! And to think I complained about a $1000 emergency room bill ( for pneumonia 4 yrs ago)! The amount is staggering, for this injury! I am very glad to have insurance!
The upside of all this time off, is I get to spend the summer with my son! We have been to the beach every day so far this week, and he has enjoyed it immensely!
The other good thing is I have had time to help my mentors with my bee hives, ( and theirs), since I can't lift my 70 lb boxes ( I have plenty of honey, let me tell you!!) I have been trying to help out in other ways, like watching their children so they can get stuff done, and have some alone time. Hopefully, it is enough.
I am overwhelmed by the outpouring of support from my church and friends, there is a gentleman from church coming over today to mow my lawn, ( he fixed my mower , again, since somehow the air cleaner and cover fell off and got mowed over...) with my mower so he can check it out to make sure it runs alright, and I get my lawn mowed! It is so difficult to rely on others to do things you are so accustomed to doing yourself! And it is sooooo hard for me to ask for help!! Why is that? Number 1, the guilt; I feel I should be able to do these things, but, I can't even wring out a mop! how sad is that!? Number 2,: the loss of my independence, I have prided myself on my ability to be completely independent, able to figure things out myself without the help of a male around. I have replaced the belt on my dryer drum, I can change my own oil on my car, I can change a flat tire, I can take off the pipes under the sinks in my house to clean out the trap ( remember, gravity and I argue often, gravity wins!) Heck, I can even change an element on my water heater if I had to ( have the tool, don't ask why...)
Now, I can't even change the belt on my vacuum cleaner, ( need the use of 2 strong hands for that), and I am too proud to ask someone to do it for me... how stupid is that? People I know, want to help, but, how do I just let go and let them? Better I think, for folks to just take over and say, this is what is going to happen and you can't change it, so just sit down and relax, ( not that I would relax when someone is doing my work for me, )
Crap, enough feeling sorry for myself, Tomorrow is Garlic fest in Hutchinson, and we have been preparing all week for it! We are going to have a booth there and will be demonstrating extracting honey from the hive the entire day!!! It is going to be a great day! My box of honey is plum full! My mentor thought I should enter a frame in the State Fair, but, I am too anxious to extract it and get honey! Besides, I am definitely not up for a State Fair visit this year, ( as well as it being cost prohibitive).
Happily, I will have enough honey for Christmas gifts ( my goal this year). And perhaps even some for purchase ( haven't decided on that yet).
Enough with the whining...
Tuesday, August 4, 2009
WTF?
Sometimes I wonder why I even bother, I get so impatient with myself... I have been making amazing progress with PT assistance, my shoulder doesn't hurt any longer ( don't want THAT pain ever again!). My elbow is slowly straightening, ( not fast enough for Ms patience , me apparently). Sheesh, my injuries could have been so much worse!! I thank God for it not being so.
On to Fb, I know I offended a person on my friends list today, but, I really don't believe all the crap local recues, turn out. I don't give a damn if she is the nicest person on the face of the earth to someone, I personally know 3 families she has interfered with as well as just meeting another person last week ( that person didn't tell me their story, but, I had heard the rumors before, and saw the perfectly fit horses that were confiscated a week later on the rescue web site). Intimidation doesn't cut it with me, and I can be fairly intimidating myself. I just actually try not to be ( mostly).
but, she ( or her lackeys) have destroyed lives ( not people deserving of being destroyed either, although, there are some, I admit that needed some help). I cannot condone that.
Anway, enough of a rant there. I am on a roll. Reading Twilight series ( for the 6th time since I purchased them in June...), I have such a huge crush on Edward... man, if a vampire like that came my way, I would not hesitate ( I don't think), he could bite me anywhere he has a mind to.
I actually had been jogging as of last week, but, the doc put the cabosh on that idea... doesn't want me to fall ( go figure...). I mean, this is why I was interval training, to increase my caloric burn, and lose weight!!! Get more fit, you know, the whole shabang... I don't care, I am going to try the 8 minute running thing. If I fall don't tell anyone I posted this... heck, I could fall from walking ( not unheard of in my world, gravity does strange things to me, and it usually wins...)
Wow, am I ever rambling today. Must mean I am feeling better, just the fact that I can type with 2 hands is cause for celebration for me!
Went out and played among my mares this morning also, my old mare Coni, has gotten the message "Be careful for Mom!" so many times, I am sure she understands what that means.
I am looking forward to the day I can ride, Coni will be the horse I get on. It is like slipping on a pair of old comfortable shoes for me to mount that girl. I know her, I know her reactions to most anything ( always qualify things with horses...), I am excited about it. I know it won't be tomorrow, ( but, maybe soon??) might not even be this year, but, I know I will be able to ride again.
This period of non work should be a great time for me to get a fitness routine establised, but once again, when I speak of it, my own mind foils my attempts, what is it about me that has to rebel against myself??
On to Fb, I know I offended a person on my friends list today, but, I really don't believe all the crap local recues, turn out. I don't give a damn if she is the nicest person on the face of the earth to someone, I personally know 3 families she has interfered with as well as just meeting another person last week ( that person didn't tell me their story, but, I had heard the rumors before, and saw the perfectly fit horses that were confiscated a week later on the rescue web site). Intimidation doesn't cut it with me, and I can be fairly intimidating myself. I just actually try not to be ( mostly).
but, she ( or her lackeys) have destroyed lives ( not people deserving of being destroyed either, although, there are some, I admit that needed some help). I cannot condone that.
Anway, enough of a rant there. I am on a roll. Reading Twilight series ( for the 6th time since I purchased them in June...), I have such a huge crush on Edward... man, if a vampire like that came my way, I would not hesitate ( I don't think), he could bite me anywhere he has a mind to.
I actually had been jogging as of last week, but, the doc put the cabosh on that idea... doesn't want me to fall ( go figure...). I mean, this is why I was interval training, to increase my caloric burn, and lose weight!!! Get more fit, you know, the whole shabang... I don't care, I am going to try the 8 minute running thing. If I fall don't tell anyone I posted this... heck, I could fall from walking ( not unheard of in my world, gravity does strange things to me, and it usually wins...)
Wow, am I ever rambling today. Must mean I am feeling better, just the fact that I can type with 2 hands is cause for celebration for me!
Went out and played among my mares this morning also, my old mare Coni, has gotten the message "Be careful for Mom!" so many times, I am sure she understands what that means.
I am looking forward to the day I can ride, Coni will be the horse I get on. It is like slipping on a pair of old comfortable shoes for me to mount that girl. I know her, I know her reactions to most anything ( always qualify things with horses...), I am excited about it. I know it won't be tomorrow, ( but, maybe soon??) might not even be this year, but, I know I will be able to ride again.
This period of non work should be a great time for me to get a fitness routine establised, but once again, when I speak of it, my own mind foils my attempts, what is it about me that has to rebel against myself??
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
